Movie Trailer Review

Here We Go Again.

Would someone please explain to me how they keep getting Milla Jovovich to keep starring in these fucking movies?


Uhg, on with the review.


This trailer opens up with everyone holding some form of a cell phone/tablet saying “this is my world” which I really don’t understand. Are we to accept that after the end of the last movie the human race goes back to normal andwe all decided to go out and buy fucking iPads? Weren’t they on a ship in the middle of the ocean in the last one? Whothe fuck knows, anyway after we see about 6 people all happy as shit with their social media devices the camera shows the other  side of earth and it gets really stupid. The camera zooms in on ALICE dressed like Raiden circa MGS2 standing on top of the WHITE HOUSE while foul winged hell beasts flap around her.


Are you fucking kidding me? She is on top of the fucking white house with fucking dragons?! It gets even better, after that we are shown glimpses of scenes all more ridiculous than the last. There is an image of the RES characters climbing up what I am assuming is Mt. Everest, a car being chased by a T-Rex/Rhino/WhogivesaFUCK, and there’s even a Halo Reach Helicopter shooting at Alice at 54 sec.

Uncanny resemblance, I know.


I think the best part of the trailer is right at the end when Alice is whipping people with chains in an all white room. That really connected with me as a RES gamer because I totally remember the part in all the RES when you beat the shit out of people with chains (LAWL). You couldn’t pay me to go see this giant waste of time.

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