Have not done a horror film trailer review in a while (Human Centipede is not a horror film, its a disgusting film) so here is one. House At The End Of The Street. What is with horror films with the word ‘house’ in them? What is so menacing about a house? House on Haunted hILL, Hell House, THE EVIL HOUSE… OK I just made the last one up, but it probably is a real title of some movie that made about 1,000.00 at the box office. Anyway, on with the review.
The trailer opens up with a girl hiding in a closet and whispering “OH MY GOD” then breaking glass and escaping the building by jumping into a car with no way of starting it, because it’s a horror film and all logical thinking is thrown out the window. Like, people will split up, run upstairs when being chased (where you gonna go up stairs?), and always get killed in the midst of sexual intercourse. I can go more into illogical thinking of characters in horror films in another post, because i could really just go on and on.
ANYWAY, this girl jumps into a car she has no way of starting and discovers a lunchbox containing a towel and a bottle of chloroform. She is then immediately attacked by a shadowy figure. Great, didn’t see that one coming. Then we go through the events of the movie kind of backwards, the girl is shown being attacked by a little blonde girl and tied to chairs and all kinds of whacky bullshit. I don’t know what we are suppose to get from all of this, I guess by going backwards they hope it will make us want to see it in chronological order to discover what is going on. That might work if the plot seemed a little interesting.
Im guessing that the main character moves into a house where some people were murdered and now the house is a malevolent force of shit. Her neighbor seems to know something but he is not ‘all there’, I wouldn’t be surprised he winds up saving her at some point in the movie either by sacrificing his own goofy ass or telling her some key weakness the house has.
Im kind of confused as to why Jennifer Lawrence would even sign up for this shit. After the success of hunger games, this does not seem like an ideal next project choice. But maybe i am giving her too much credit for assuming she actually has a brain in her fucking head.